On Tuesday 12th January at our regular Risen rehearsals at the Bluecoat, Paul put us into groups to choreograph our own dance piece, to perform for the rest of the group. I was paired with Rachel Foster and to be honest we were both feeling somewhat scattered that day. Rather than choreographing something very specific and structured, we focused on expressing a narrative of a recovery journey, with its many twists, turns and challenges to overcome - resulting in peace and connection, something we felt we are all striving for. For us it was a case of improvisation. We had some specific moves in mind but what ocurred in between was a result of our mutual connection and awareness of each other, in that specific moment. What we performed wasn't exactly the same as what we had rehearsed but that wasn't the point, it was about our connection and the expression of certain feelings associated with various stages of a recovery journey: frustration, chaos, connection, disconnection, despair and tranquility and every nuance of emotion in between. Paul often says that when it comes to dance, we each have a signature movement or movements that are our "go to" phrases that we feel comfortable with and tend to repeat over and over again. For me, that could very well be a metaphor for the patterns of behaviour I have repeated again and again throughout my life. The recovery and personal growth I have been privileged to experience over the last few months has been via my work with a sponsor in 12 Step Fellowship and the weekly counselling I commenced before Christmas. There is a massive emphasis on positive change and letting go of behaviour patterns that no longer serve me well, together with learning a healthier way to be, mind body and spirit. Rachel and I were conscious of working together to move beyond our respective comfort zones and risk attempting new movements that lay beyond the realm of what we both felt safe with. The result was a deeply textured performance, laden with connection and feeling.
After rehearsals, Paul introduced us to Alesha Chaunte,a fellow creative who had approached Risen about a personal project she was working on. Having overcome the traumatic experience of throat cancer and subsequent throat surgery, she decided to explore Kitsugi, The Japanese art of embracing damage, where ceramic pieces are broken, with the cracks filled and mended with the insertion of gold. Meeting Aleasha touched me deeply and I connected intensely with her story. My journey in recovery has included several life-saving suregeries on my legs. Today I am deeply scarred from the waist down, not to mention the psychological and spiritual scars I already possess. Time is a great healer and crying out for healing on all fronts, the universe is providing me with every tool necessary to gild my broken pieces together - and just like Kitsugi, what I am becoming is more beautiful than what was there before. I currently have three relatives who are deeply ill with cancer, it is an illness that seems to cast a morbid shadow over the lives of many people. Though very sad, I try and focus on appreciating the life that my cancer-stricken family have today, rather than mourning what will come to pass in days to come. It is a karmic lesson in powerlessness. I express gratitude for all our lives, every minute we have is a divine blessing, for life is fleeting at best, every moment is beyond precious. Aleasha also told us about the Grimm Fairy Tale "The Handless Maiden", an old folk story that has been reinterpreted in many cultures, telling the story of a woman who overcomes the amputation of her hands and various challenges, to in the end find peace, happiness and her own happy ending. Like Kitsugi and The Handless Maiden, we are all damaged in our own unique way. Damaged but not broken and our respective traumas become our strengths. And here we all are, travelling this mysterious path we call our lives, journeying to our happy endings.
Speaking of happy endings, we were all so excited to meet a journalist from the new digital recovery magazine "Hooked", who had come to interview Paul, to talk to us and to watch us rehearse. She told Rachel and I that she had really felt the connection between us and that our piece had impacted on her, which was such a compliment. Amanda, Phil and I were interviewed briefly, to add a little personal element to the magazine feature. We each shared some deep, personal truths, risking being vulnerable with each other - and as a result we all bame closer. The truth really does set you free.
After rehearsals, Paul introduced us to Alesha Chaunte,a fellow creative who had approached Risen about a personal project she was working on. Having overcome the traumatic experience of throat cancer and subsequent throat surgery, she decided to explore Kitsugi, The Japanese art of embracing damage, where ceramic pieces are broken, with the cracks filled and mended with the insertion of gold. Meeting Aleasha touched me deeply and I connected intensely with her story. My journey in recovery has included several life-saving suregeries on my legs. Today I am deeply scarred from the waist down, not to mention the psychological and spiritual scars I already possess. Time is a great healer and crying out for healing on all fronts, the universe is providing me with every tool necessary to gild my broken pieces together - and just like Kitsugi, what I am becoming is more beautiful than what was there before. I currently have three relatives who are deeply ill with cancer, it is an illness that seems to cast a morbid shadow over the lives of many people. Though very sad, I try and focus on appreciating the life that my cancer-stricken family have today, rather than mourning what will come to pass in days to come. It is a karmic lesson in powerlessness. I express gratitude for all our lives, every minute we have is a divine blessing, for life is fleeting at best, every moment is beyond precious. Aleasha also told us about the Grimm Fairy Tale "The Handless Maiden", an old folk story that has been reinterpreted in many cultures, telling the story of a woman who overcomes the amputation of her hands and various challenges, to in the end find peace, happiness and her own happy ending. Like Kitsugi and The Handless Maiden, we are all damaged in our own unique way. Damaged but not broken and our respective traumas become our strengths. And here we all are, travelling this mysterious path we call our lives, journeying to our happy endings.
Speaking of happy endings, we were all so excited to meet a journalist from the new digital recovery magazine "Hooked", who had come to interview Paul, to talk to us and to watch us rehearse. She told Rachel and I that she had really felt the connection between us and that our piece had impacted on her, which was such a compliment. Amanda, Phil and I were interviewed briefly, to add a little personal element to the magazine feature. We each shared some deep, personal truths, risking being vulnerable with each other - and as a result we all bame closer. The truth really does set you free.